I’ve spent a lot of time over the past six months coming to understand some of the best and worst messages I’ve received over my lifetime. Some were discarded along the way but most are buried deep within me and they play out like a compass navigating me through each day. Meg also alludes to MY WORDS, MY THOUGHTS and of the choice we have at every moment of every day to challenge and overcome what I’ll call ‘my best thinking’.
It is most definitely a journey we are on, it’s not an express train it’s a work in progress.
One of the most prolific messages running through my mind is “you never finish anything”. This immediately sets me up for failure and even worse it labels that failure as acceptable. It is, after all, inevitable.
The other monster in the closet is a fundamental belief that I am not worthy. This is a really dense concept because it can, for whatever reason, rear it’s ugly head in so many ways. I recently posted a clip on FB from Brene Brown, I’ve watched it numerous times and get something more out of it each time I watch it. How it plays out day to day for me is a fear of vulnerability and authenticity. Translation: I fear that if you know “xyz” about me you won’t like me anymore or if I tell you how I feel/think about “xyz” you won’t like me anymore.
My challenge this year, like Meg, will not come from the scales. I believe it will be measured by a sense of self – apart from others, the ability to discern what is right for me and articulate those thoughts.